Archive | June, 2015

Do you know?

3 Jun

Do you know I have a daughter, who is worth her weight in gold,

Do you know the things I wondered? All the stories I was told?

Do you know how often tears fell as I gently felt her kick?

Do you know the thought of her arrival made me feel so sick?

Do you know that awful feeling when you’re sharing troubling news?

Do you know what it can feel like when the doctor says, “you choose”?

Do you know how to be ‘present’ when you want to run away,

When your eldest child so needs you, but you don’t know what to say?

Do you know for twenty weeks I wondered what was yet to come?

Do you know for twenty weeks before, I was already her mum?

Do you know how brave my husband was? What a rock he was for me?

Do you know he also ran his brain over every possibility?

Do you know how strong that I was on the day that she was born?

How I held my shit together, while inside my heart was torn?

How calm it was, how nice they were, how peaceful it all felt,

Until it finally came crashing down and I needed extra help?

Did you know her little body was a motley shade of blue;

That the room fell silent, almost like they wondered what to do?

Do you know they had to help my girl to take a little breath;

That the doctors and the nurses, surely helped evade her death?

Do you know she sounded like a cat, the first time that she cried?

Do you know they took my girl away, her Daddy by her side?

Do you know that it was hours til I held her close once more?

Do you know how hard it was for him, and all the things he saw?

Do you know they let us take her home, like ‘normal’, five days old?

Do you know how strange that was for us after all that we’d been told?

Do you know the fear that surfaced when it finally was able,

When the info was presented, and the cards laid on the table?

Do you know the battles that we’ve faced, the fear and desperation?

Do you know the milestones that we’ve met with joy and adoration?

Do you know how strong we’ve had to be? How tough we really are?

Do you know the people that we’ve met and how we’ve come so far?

Do you know that countless other parents face such fears each day?

Do you know that you can’t judge them til you’ve ever felt this way?

Do you know that sharing stories is one way that I survive,

And that I marvel at my miracle each day that she’s alive?

Do you know how grateful that I am for those who really care;

For the family and friends who see the gift that’s present there?

Do you know each tiny milestone redirects us where to go?

Do you know how much I love her? Really? Do you know?


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